|
BOB ILES Bob Iles... where do you start? My first encounters with Bob weren't that memorable to be honest, from my perspective at least. Being repeatedly smashed into the Pylewell Park duck pond wasn't exactly good for the morale of a spotty-faced teenage bowler. Or for the ducks, for that matter. But if Bob cut an intimidating figure when wielding that old railway sleeper he called a cricket bat, it was nothing compared to facing his bowling. Despite his size, Bob could generate a fair amount of pace, and together with his deadly accuracy, intimidating and unfathomable facial hair and a bumpy Hordle wicket (Bob always maintained that the only green bit at Hordle Rec in those days was the moss growing on the changing hut roof), facing Bob's bowling back then was akin to encountering a rampaging Viking. Born in Southampton in 1950, Bob spent his childhood at Sherfield English and Whiteparish before moving to Hordle where his father ran the butchers shop. He was employed at Marchwood Military base for a time, and more recently did sterling work with boys with Asperger Syndrome for the Cambian Group. He was also a volunteer with the Wessex Youth Offending Team working with youngsters to identify and address problems. Among those of a certain age, Bob will perhaps be most fondly remembered working as a nightclub bouncer, especially at Barton on Sea's much lamented Embassy Club. When Bob said you weren't coming in, you really weren't coming in! He was also employed at the Top Rank in Southampton, and famously once escorted Saints' legend Terry Paine off the premises. He also, not so famously, threw out the lead singer of the Stranglers by mistake during one of their concerts, claiming later, "Well, it was dark in there!" It was while working on the doors of another club, The Village in Bournemouth, that Bob memorably met wife Joan. Legend has it that a fracas broke out and Bob rescued his future wife by lifting her on to a fruit machine and, as Bob once recalled, "She soon realised she'd hit the jackpot!" Bob and Joan were duly married in 1982 and their marriage produced three children: Rob, Suzie and Ali, and two grand-children Flynn and Cooper, all of whom idolised Bob. Some years after my Pylewell duck pond bashing I was fortunate enough to become a clubmate of Bob who was by now captaining Lymington Third XI and still regularly pillaging the opposition batting down at Woodside. Despite being one of the more mature players in the team, Bob was still the most consistent bowler, regularly taking 25 or more wickets a season. He won numerous player of the year awards for the Third and Fourth XIs, and also received the best bowler award for Hampshire League Division South West 3 in 2001. It was perhaps no coincidence that Lymington Fourth XI's fortunes soon dipped after Bob's retirement in 2004. Bob's undoubted ability with the ball was often emphasised during Lymington's annual Presidents Day fixture when Bob would invariably snare a wicket or two of a distinguished first team batsman, much to the chagrin of the unfortunate batsman who would be reminded about the dismissal long into the night and for many months beyond. Even the most ardent cricketer would probably admit that chasing a little piece of leather round a field for several hours can become rather arduous at times. Which is why cricket needed characters like Bob Iles. With Bob in your team even the dullest of fixtures would turn into an afternoon full of entertainment and laughter. A cross between Peter Kay and Eric Morecombe (with a touch of Benny Hill thrown in for good measure) Bob and his razor sharp wit could make fun of any individual or any situation. And he could take his fair share of stick back too. In his later playing days, Bob's size did inhibit his fielding technique somewhat, and the only thing funnier than Bob's attempts to stop the ball were Bob's attempts to explain why he failed to stop the ball! Senior players sometimes have to be 'hidden' in the outfield by their captain; the council built a skate park at Woodside and Bob was even too big to hide behind that. It was in the Sports Ground bar after a match that Bob was really in his element. He had the uncanny knack of reducing all in the room to tears of laughter with his wicked put-downs and one liners. Stories of late night card schools and drinking sessions abound. Far too many for this tribute – just ask Bodders, Thorpy, Meg, Dom, Luigi, Heady, Walford, Shaggy, Goffy, McGuirk, CJ, Neil Perrett, Figgy, Chernoble... the list goes on and on. All will have their own special story to tell about Bob Iles. It would be something of an understatement to say that Bob liked a drink or two. It was said (by Bob himself) that he once arrived home in a rather inebriated state and, unable to find his house keys, decided to climb up on top of a dustbin and enter his house via a kitchen window. It was only as he was clambering into the kitchen that he suddenly realised that his house didn't have a dustbin outside the kitchen window. He was in fact climbing into his nextdoor neighbour's house. On another occasion after a particularly boozy night at the Sports Ground, the big man was met at his front door by wife Joan. "Bob, are you drunk?" she asked. "I bleedin' well hope so", replied Bob, "or I've just wasted 45 quid!" As well as playing for Lymington, Bob was also heavily involved in the general running of the club. He served on the committee between 1994 and 2004 and, appropriately enough for someone with such an in-depth knowledge of alcohol, was bar manager for several years. (He was also the only member of the club who could lift two full beer barrels at the same time). Bob and Joan also cleaned the clubhouse, and Joan's teas, especially on Presidents Day, were always something to look forward to. Bob's work for the club was duly recognised in 2006 when he was elected as a Vice President. Bob also had a short and successful spell at Milford CC, but cricket was just one of Bob's many sporting talents. A fine darts player (well, he had the perfect physique for it), Bob represented Southampton in the Hampshire Super League between 1982 and 1988, defeating professionals Bob Anderson and Cliff Lazarenko among many others. He also threw for Brockenhurst FC where he was a loyal committee man and keen 'Badgers' supporter. In his younger days Bob played a decent standard of rugby for Winchester and hockey for Salisbury, and in later years turned out for Hordle Spurs FC until his knees gave out. After retiring from playing cricket, Bob, wishing to remain involved in the game, joined the South Coast Panel of Cricket Umpires and thoroughly enjoyed putting back into cricket much of the enjoyment he had taken from it as a player. Earlier this year Bob was proud to be invited to be the third official when his beloved Lymington reached the final of the Southern League Twenty20 cup final at the Rose Bowl. Typically, he also became the first umpire in the league's history to give a batsman 'timed out' when Bournemouth's Ed Denham took too long to reach the wicket. That was Bob – wherever he went, something interesting always happened. Although his umpiring duties took him all over the county on a Saturday afternoon, Bob more often than not returned to the Sports Ground later in the evening to find out how the various Lymington sides had fared that day. And of course, to share a beer or six with his old mates. The mere sight of Bob ambling into the bar with that little glint in his eye was enough to instantly cheer everyone up. It's something that will be terribly missed by all at Lymington Cricket Club, and by the wider sporting community as a whole. The word 'character' is perhaps a little overused in sport these days, but definitely not in Bob's case. Farewell Bob Iles... the biggest character of them all. Trevor Philips
Bob Iles tributes Bob was a colourful, cheerful character whose presence at our club was always welcome. An expert at chirping at the wrong time, but it was worth waiting for those magic moments. Bob's contribution both on and off the field was massive and will be sorely missed by all the local cricketing fraternity. Bob was a gentle giant and extremely popular with all our members. In addition to his love of sport he was a devoted family man. He will be missed by all of us at Lymington. Peter Tapper, Chairman Lymington CC
Bob's shouts of "Hand Bag!" echoing from the clubhouse stick in my mind and always will. His achievement of becoming a recognised Southern League umpire was particularly impressive from my point of view. What a fantastic personality that will be sadly missed by all of us. Neil Trestrail
Bob's legacy will live on in the hearts of so many people, especially those at Lymington CC. His humour, sense of fun, the laughter he shared, made every cricket night in the clubhouse a night to remember. Memories of Bob's antics & exploits will live on forever. Waving a bottle of Becks, shouting "lovely boy, shoulders back!" Two stories still make me laugh: Bob batting with Taps at Swan Green, Taps slogging his way to fifty, as another Tapper shot was despatched over the road at mid wicket for six. The bowler's anguished cry to his skipper that the ball was outside off stump was met, quick as a flash, by Bob 'that the ball was now outside the Swan Inn!!!' Secondly, the memory of the plume of black smoke coming from my hire car, when it stubbornly refused to transport Bob and I up the steep hill leading to our tour hotel in Ventnor. Club dinners won't be the same without the 'friendly heckling and banter' from a certain Mr Robert Iles. Bob, we're going to miss you; our thoughts at this time are with Joan, Rob, Ali & Suzie. David Coles
I have many memories of Bob and was privileged to be on the end of most of his mickey-taking. One specific memory is of the Rose Bowl in 2001 when we beat Andover in the Southern Electric Cup final. Bob was spectating with the rest of the crowd that travelled from Lymington, and as the Andover wickets went down Bob turned to the Andover team and called out "NEXT!" At the end of the match Bob's final comment was, "how many Ds in DICKED?!" Tony Jenkin
Lymington Cricket Club will never be the same again on Saturday nights. We will all miss Bob, a lovely bloke, rest in peace. Lee Moors
There are many stories I am sure about Bob but I know when I was Chairman of Lymington CC in the early 90's at the committee meetings he always had a humorous comment to brighten up proceedings - his spontaneous humour was amazing, a tremendous gift that will be sadly missed. Tony Wharton
During the 2009 season Bob and I spent much time together, usually at the bar reminiscing about games we had played against one another and the success of the first team. Bob and I were of similar age and shared a common interest in the importance of family life, something that Bob was both proud and passionate about.
Bob was a terrific umpiring 'mate' - a true character with a capital 'C'. As you know, he loved his role as an umpire - always taking the game seriously and always ready with a witty or forthright comment! Bob gave Lymington CC a great deal of loyalty and Lymington CC gave Bob much pride and many friendships. Like so many others, I shall miss him terribly. Chris Read - umpire
It's hard to imagine summers at Lymo without the big fellah ... definitely a legend! Very sad times for the club, the cricket community and of course the Iles family. Fred McKie
Bob was a larger than life character, someone with strong personality and an absolute ripper of a sense of humour! You couldn't miss or not hear Bob inside the Lymington clubrooms, always telling a joke or story, normally with beer in hand. His wit and infectious laugh always demanded attention, such was the character of the bloke. From my time at Lymington, I saw Bob as a passionate, knowledgeable cricket lover, and most of all, a passionate Lymingtonian. Bob and I had countless debates on all things cricket, both off the field and on it. Bob was good umpire who was strong with his decisions, and demanded respect from all players. And if you didn't, he certainly put you in your place.. My greatest memory of Bob was the last league game of the 2007 summer. I was keen to finish the season on a good note and make some runs. As it happened, Bob gave me out LBW for not many when I was convinced it wasn't out. The result was another great debate for hours after the game, both of us discussing the dismissal in every intricate detail, and I think at one point Bob pulled out the laws of cricket, such was the passion of the man. Of course this happened over many pints of beer, many laughs, and was always done in the right spirit. Although we disagreed, it was finished with a handshake (which almost broke my hand!). I look back on my time with Lymington with fond memories, and although I didn't know Bob all that long, Bob certainly provided me a number of memories that will last my life time. I will never forget Bob. Bob Iles was a great man, and will be sorely missed by all involved with the Lymington Cricket Club and I would like to pass on my condolences to Bob's family at this hard time. Sam Raphael
My lasting memory of Bob, among many, is a match played at Bramshaw in the late 70's. Bob had hit the ball off the square and I had chased it down. By that time they had completed 2 runs; but Bob did not know me well at that time. I had a 'good arm' and as they set off for a 3rd run I returned the ball 60-65 yards fast and flat into Pete Brinkley's gloves who then ran him out by a distance. As Bob reached the gate on his way to the pavilion he threw his bat in disgust. It is quite some distance uphill but the bat managed to reach the pavilion before Bob did. We have spoken about this many times since and exchanged respect for each other as club cricketers. We have stood together since both taking up umpiring to put something back onto the game that we both played competitively. I last saw and spoke to him at the AGM of the South Coast Panel. He will be missed in local cricket circles. Ken Webb, umpire
I first met Ilsey nearly thirty years ago, when he threw me across a table in the public bar of the White Horse in Milford. From strange beginnings a friendship developed and it was indeed to be a few years before he inflicted physical pain on me again... as a purely precautionary measure in the old Embassy Club in Barton where he was in the process of enforcing security!! In the meantime, Bob became a good friend and playing colleague, a man whose character and humour shone through both on and off the field. We shared many a beer, a few hair raising incidents and more than one Chinese or Indian meal over the years, and I am sure I am not alone in having a host of funny and memorable stories I could tell where the name Iles would feature prominently! I will always remember Bob as a larger than life personality in so many ways, and I feel my life was enriched and enlivened for meeting him. To Joan, Robert, Susan and Alistair, I hope it will help to know that there are people thinking of you on the other side of the world. To Bob, thanks for the memories mate. Ian Pearson - Victoria, Australia
Bob was larger than life, and like everyone else I will always remember his acerbic wit, and his put-downs and ribbing of fellow members and players was legendary. I can remember a night (I am of that certain age) at the Embassy Club, Bob explaining in some detail to a 17 year old Steve Andrew how to bowl the perfect away swinger; and on another occasion at the Sports Ground after a league match against Trojans he lectured in some detail a youthful Robin Smith how to play the cover drive. Bob treated us all just the same and it was probably a mark of respect for one to be the butt of his jokes! Bob was a great friend and supporter of Lymington and his sense of fun will be sorely missed on Saturday nights during the cricket season. Jerry Holt
On behalf of all New Milton Cricket Club Members I would like to say how sad we were to here of Bob's passing on Christmas Day. Bob was a special man and a welcome figure at our ground at Fernhill. I have many personal memories of Bob, as I had known him for 30 years of my life. None more clearly than when he literally threw me into my car one night after I'd staggered out of the Embassy Club when it was snowing, and he pointed me in the direction I should drive home in. He will be sorely missed on the park and in the bar. I have a special lasting memory of being the captain of NMCC 2nd XI for his last league game in August 2009. Steve Taylor – New Milton CC |
